A soiree with Sarah Jessica Parker or grabbing drinks with Jimmy Fallon? A slow Thursday night for Andy Cohen.
The Watch What Happens host and Real Housewives executive producer stopped by on the Howard Stern Show to discuss his second memoir. Appropriately titled The Andy Cohen Diaries (a la The Andy Warhol Diaries), the book details a year in his star-studded, hilarious, drama-dominated life as the Homecoming King of television.
Put Cohen and the King of All Media in a room together, and you've got a vault of delightfully embarrassing celeb stories – and the no bullsh-t commentary to match.
However, Cohen told Stern he did not set out to damage any reputations in his new book.
"My goal in this book is not to sell anybody out," Cohen said. "The thing about Warhol's diaries is they came out after he died. He said some horrible things about people he was friends with! Many things! And I really try to celebrate every single person in this book."
Like that one time Madonna came to a house party of his, for example. The Material Girl requested Krug Rose Champagne and declared that any other kind is for losers. The tidbit is not meant to make Madge look high maintenance.
"I think it makes her look like the Queen! She's Madonna," Cohen said.
Nevertheless, not all of Cohen's relationships with household names are so peachy keen. David Letterman never asked him back after his first visit on Late Night.
"I felt like I really bombed or pissed him off or something," Cohen said. "We were talking about his alcoholism … and he said he hadn't had a drink in a certain amount of time. And I said, 'I'm gonna give you a chip when I leave,' referring to AA or something, and it was a throwaway comment, but I don't think he liked it … He immediately turned to me and said, 'Are we done?'."
But Monica Lewinsky would totally hang out with Andy Cohen again. In fact, the two recently swapped stories about the internships that, erm, put them on the map in the entertainment industry.
"She was at my book party actually, the other night," he said. "What's funny is I introduced her to a correspondent from CBS News for whom I interned 25 years ago … The correspondent said to Monica, 'Oh, Andrew was my intern!' And Monica said, 'Oh, I was an intern too!'."
Cohen also recently stayed on John Mayer's ranch in Montana. Mayer opened up to Cohen about his recent breakup with Katy Perry and cooked him breakfast every morning during his visit. (Cohen clearly has a lot more self-control than a lot of gossip columnists and high school sophomores.)
"I went by myself. I brought my long-term lover: ME," Cohen said. "A rock star with bed head is free balling and making you breakfast. You're like, 'This is good. I love this! Make me an omelette, John Mayer!' … I don't waste my time getting in the realm of thinking that I have a chance to screw around with a straight person."
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