Gilbert Speaks to His True Fans

Gilbert Gottfried came into the studio not only to say goodbye, but also to promote his DVD, "Gilbert Gottfried: Dirty Jokes," one final time. Gary commented that he was looking at Gilbert's Web site recently and noticed that it has a new fan club feature.

Gilbert explained that it doesn't cost any money to sign up for the fan club, and that he sometimes sends e-mails through the feature. When Howard wondered what else subscribers to the fan club get besides the messages, Gilbert responded, "A sense of wasted time."

From the Great Beyond

Howard pointed out that the only name worse than his is Gilbert, and he wondered if he liked it. Gilbert admitted he wasn't thrilled with the name, especially because he felt like every nerd in the movies seems to have the name.

After Howard commented that Gilbert grew into the name, he asked if he was a disappointment to his parents. Gilbert commented that his father, who owned a hardware store, died when he was 19, so he never got to see his success.

Gilbert went on to recall that he helped out his father at the store once in a while, and that his dad was kind to him. Despite their good relationship, Gilbert admitted that he wasn't asked to speak at his father's funeral.

Gilbert added that if he had been propositioned to say a few words at the service, he probably would've ended up doing five minutes of his standup routine.

The Best of Gilbert

Howard brought up that many of his favorite clips of Gilbert could no longer air because of their content, but that there were plenty of FCC-friendly bits as well. The first one Howard played was when he and Gilbert called Jerry Seinfeld's answering machine and left a 28-minute message.

Howard remembered that on the day of the call, Jerry was scheduled to be a guest on the show, but neither came in nor canceled. Given this, Howard and Gilbert tried to get in touch with him, only to reach his answering machine.

During the message, Gilbert did his impression of Jerry, and carried on a conversation with Howard. Following the clip, Gary reported that Jerry, who was still a friend of the show at the time, called him and said he checked his messages at an airport that day, and listened to the entire talk Howard and Gilbert had left him because it was so funny. The next clip Howard played was when Gilbert was in the studio and Dennis Miller called in with his 22-month-old son, Holden.

After the tape, Howard noted that Dennis was so offended by what Gilbert said about his son that he hadn't heard from him since. Robin pointed out, though, that hearing Gilbert make fun of Dennis and his son was worth losing him as a guest. Howard commented that of all the moments Gilbert has provided to the show, his "shining moment" occurred when he got Abe Hirschfeld, who was calling in from jail, to repeat the same joke six times.

Upon playing the tape, Howard noted that he was shocked Abe had been such a successful businessman, given that he had fallen for Gilbert's joke so many times. Before Gilbert left, Howard thanked him for all the years he's been on the show.

Howard went on to mention that although his audience is polarized when it comes to Gilbert, most great performers elicit that kind of reaction.