Triumph the Insult Comic Dog came in today fresh from losing the Best Comedy Album award at the Grammy's to the audio version of Jon Stewart's book "America". Howard said he knew Triumph would lose to Jon Stewart because Jon is a media darling. Triumph said if Jon was any more of a media darling, they'd tie a bow around his head. Then Triumph would have sex with Jon so he'd have at least one funny bone in his body. Triumph then added that he was kidding and actually loves Jon Stewart. Howard said it was funny seeing Triumph with Joan Rivers at the Grammy's because Joan had the cameraman shoot the Jew with the hand in Triumph - Robert Smigel.
Howard said it was funny how freaked out Robert got over it. Triumph said there is nothing more horrifying than watching a puppeteer at work. Triumph also thinks that when Joan Rivers messes up people's names at award shows -- like when she called MC Hammer "MJ Hammer" multiple times at the Grammy's -- it's just an act. He said that's her way of making sure people don't talk about her face. Triumph was also promoting a charity event he's hosting called Comedy Love Call with comics like Adam Sandler, Lewis Black and Jon Stewart to help raise money for autism. Howard tried asking Triumph about autism, but it seemed as if he didn't know much about it. He just knew it was different than being plain retarded. As usual, Triumph had a ton of great zingers during his appearance. Here are just a few: - On how the Grammy's got Star Jones to work the red carpet: "They told her it was a giant fruit roll up." - Triumph said, "The TV Guide Channel is so crappy, it's not even listed in TV Guide." - On Joan Rivers' plastic surgery: "Her face is so tight even I have more facial expressions than she does." - Triumph said, "Joan Rivers is a hero to the animal world because it was her face that inspired the doggy position." - On Star Jones: "She's like a big, cuddly black lab?and that's just her breath."