ELEPHANT BOY ASIAN ELF The next time the door bell rang, Howard was surprised to find our own Asian Elf from the South Pole, Fred the Elephant Boy. Fred read his part from the cheesy script perfectly - except no one could understand him. And then, in his best William Hung voice, he sang a rousing version of "Here Comes Santa Claus" only it sounded more like he was rapping it on one breath rather than singing it. After noting that Fred had his earphones on inside out, Howard thanked him and told him that he had nailed it. Fred then discussed - we think - how he was no longer seeing his girlfriend, but he was ok with that. Fred said he had decided he wasn't going to be wild and stupid anymore. He said there would be no more gay experiences for him. Artie started to protest this but Fred cut him off saying that he had crossed Artie's name off his list of suitors. Howard thanked Fred for all the great contributions he has made to the show and then gave him a gift of $500 cash courtesy of the new movie, "Darkness."