Richard "Creepy" Christy won Stump the Perv by a landslide yesterday. One of the rewards for his victory was a date with the beautiful porn star Krystal Steal. So after the show yesterday the two of them went for a picnic in Central Park.
Howard thought that Richard should have taken her to Scores instead but, after hearing the details of his date, thought Richard was probably better off with the picnic. From the sound of things, if they had gone to Scores, Krystal probably would have ended up making out with a stripper all night and Richard would have been forgotten in the corner. E! producer Doug Goodstein said the date got off to a funny start when Richard tried to open a bottle of champagne - by using a corkscrew to open it. Robin said she couldn't imagine that, at 30 years old, Richard had never opened a bottle of champagne before and Artie, doing his impression of Christy, said that he didn't know that beer came in such big bottles.
Howard played some audio from the date, which sounded like somewhat of a drag because Krystal kept telling Richard everything he was doing wrong. She complained that he talked with food in his mouth and burped too much. Richard apologized to her and Howard said that he should have told her that he gets chicks every week acting just like this. Doug said that Christy is the most even-tempered guy he ever met, but Robin said she thinks he must be masking a lot of anger. Howard played some more of his date and heard Richard tell Steal that he has pleasured himself to her close to 80 times. He also told her that he only pleasures himself once a week because he gets so tired from it and he doesn't want that to interfere with his work.
Krystal suggested that Christy get himself a girlfriend. Howard suggested that Richard stop acting like himself and just be phony when he's out with girls. Richard said he was just going to block out all the negative stuff from the date and concentrate on the one moment of intimacy he had with her when Krystal hand-fed him a strawberry. Originally Richard wanted do to feed her the fruit but she declined, saying she doesn't like to eat food other guy's have touched. Once she popped one in his mouth though, the disappointment quickly wore off.