Comedian Nick Dipaolo came in to sit in on the news today. Nick had just done a gig with Artie so Howard asked if he thought Artie should cut back on his drinking. Nick was hesitant in answering the question at first, saying instead that Artie is always smiling when he drinks so maybe it's a not a bad thing. Howard pointed out that Artie's new comedy DVD has a sober Artie on it and it's great, so maybe Artie shouldn't drink at his shows. Nick agreed, noting that Artie is really funny when he's sober on this show, so he doesn't need alcohol to be funny.
After a caller told how he drank a ton with Artie before his Delaware gig, Artie admitted he did have a drinking problem - but it wasn't so bad that he needed to do anything about it. Howard told Artie he needed to examine what made him drink so much. Artie blamed doing gigs on the road as the cause of his drinking and he really doesn't understand why more comedians don't do it as well. He said comedians who don't drink, like Nick, are like super men to him. Nick said that he does drink, but he only has five or six, (which is apparently the same thing as not drinking to Artie). Artie said if he had to examine his problem, the reason he drinks is because for a brief time he's actually happy and having a good time and not worrying about things.
Howard said Artie is just looking for a way to get back into his mother's womb for awhile, but that's ok. Everyone feels like that, you just have to acknowledge it and then work on it. Howard said he was worried about Artie's health and Nick said he was too because Artie often sounded unhappy when they spoke. Artie yelled at Nick that he wasn't exactly a barrel of laughs either. Artie then told everyone to talk louder so every casting agent in America could hear the conversation.