Stern Bytes

Some quick clips from today's show -

— Howard announces he will not be able to make the New York City Star Wars III premier!

— "Lost" star Evangeline Lilly bad mouthed Howard in an interview! She said that at first she was flattered to hear that Howard named her the sexiest woman of the year, but later said once she found out Howard's "reputation" towards women she was less thrilled. Howard said that Beth found that article which really depressed him.

— The crew played "Guess that Retard" in which they try to guess which actor plays which retarded role in clips from the movies; Tom Hanks as Forrest Gump, Dustin Hoffman as Rainman and Leonardo DiCaprio as Gilbert Grape were all featured. The idea was to yell out your answer in your best "retard" voice, but only Robin really got into the spirit that way.

— The newest sexual fetish? Farting! Howard played a clip from a fetish movie that was supposed to be a bunch of hot naked girls farting and moaning, although Howard thought the farts were fake. Either way, he said there was absolutely nothing sexy about that tape.

— CBS Vice President of Late Night Programming East Cost and "Restless Restless" co-writer, Vinnie Favale, appeared as Elvis on a bit on Letterman last week. Howard played a clip from it and said it was really bad. Vinnie is funny as Vinnie, not as a character, and everyone thought the lines they wrote him were lame. Howard did say his costume was pretty funny.

— Howard again begged Viacom to fire him so he could move to satellite and speak his mind - uncensored.

— All of our guests canceled today. Snoop Dogg was the big guest but cancelled with a "bad voice" at the last moment. The other guest, a former stripper named Lisa who says she can't seem to get a normal job because she looks too much like a stripper, just didn't show up. You don't suppose her inability to get a job has anything to do with her inability to show up do you?