How to Not Treat a Woman

Jose Canseco's ex-wife, Jessica, dropped by to talk about her spread in this month's Playboy, as well as her new book, "Juicy: Confessions of a Former Baseball Wife." Howard commented that men are vile because they want certain women, do anything they can to get with them, marry them, and then suddenly dump them. Jessica felt that was exactly what happened to her with Jose. She met him when she was working as a waitress at a Hooters in Cleveland when she was only 19, and he pursued her intensely. They ended up getting married when she was 21. As time went on though, Jessica said it became obvious to her that Jose was cheating on her. However, she went back to him three times despite the way he was treating her. She claimed Jose has been asking her to get back together recently, but she refuses to do so. Gary said that when Jose was on the show recently, he told Gary they should have Jessica on. From the way Jose was talking, Gary thought the two of them were dating again. Jessica told Gary, however, that was not the case.

Light in the Loafers?

After watching Jose wear stockings and panties in an episode of the "Surreal Life," Howard wanted to know if Jessica thought he was a little gay. She said Jose was as straight as they come. Howard mentioned that Jessica looked too muscular in her Playboy pictures. She admitted she was, in fact, heavier then and was pretty ripped because of all the kickboxing she was doing. Howard told her she was much hotter in person than she was in the magazine – something that rarely ever happens.

Three's Company

Because she was young and naïve, Jessica wanted to make her relationship with Jose work, despite his cheating. To accomplish this, she even brought one of her girl friends into the bed with them after a night of drinking in a club in Miami. When they got in the bedroom, Jose and Jessica kissed. She then lifted her skirt, got on top of Jose and started having sex with him. In the meantime, Jessica began fondling and making out with her now-naked friend. Jose asked Jessica if he could have sex with her friend, which she agreed to. Jessica said she got really turned on watching Jose and her friend go at it. As the story was reaching its climax, Gary reluctantly interrupted Howard to tell him that Tom was almost out of delay because they had dumped so much out of the story. Robin thought the conversation was sanitized. Howard asked Jessica if she'd walk with him over to SIRIUS right then so she could finish the story. Jessica said she has an even spicier tale in her book. No one could guess what would top the story she just told, so she dropped a few hints. She said that she was in another threesome with one of her model friends and her boyfriend. Jessica mentioned that the sex was better and that it lasted longer this time. She added people would have to buy her book to get all the details.