While Artie finished his third shot of Jack Daniels, Iris came into the studio to a round of applause. Iris then said she last had sex "a couple of weeks ago" with her husband, and assured Artie she didn't have any diseases and had the HIV-test results to prove it. Iris then showed off her underwear, causing Artie to yell, "Where the hell's the Jack Daniels?"
Artie proceeded to walk to Iris, and put his arm around her. Artie told Blue to "get ready" and then locked lips her, as the crowd moaned and clapped. Once the 10 seconds were up, Gary pointed out that Artie "grabbed Iris' ass" during their kiss, and Howard said he squeezed her breasts as well.
Artie then admitted the kiss "wasn't that bad," but wouldn't go back for seconds, despite the crowd's insistence. Iris then referred to Artie as "a very sexy person," although she acknowledged she didn't like the taste of the alcohol on his breath seeing as she didn't drink. She also claimed that Artie was "down in her tonsils" at one point. Artie went on to note his mouth tasted like "lipstick and an old age home" following the kiss, and Crackhead Bob called him a "homo" when Artie declined to make out with Kristen...even though she was hot and willing to make out with him.
Artie did get her number though. Howard then got to the audience, and Sean recommended Artie "go boil his tongue," while Sam said he "felt bad for Artie" and Sal noted the kiss wasn't "as bad as 'Beer League,' but it was close." Jon also mentioned he felt the kiss would lead to some good conversations on today's "Wrap Up Show." Artie proceeded to ask Howard if he could "blow off the news" to go drinking, adding that, if Howard thought he normally slept through the news, he'd take it to an extreme today.