From Backstage to the Phones

Eric the Midget, who's been trying to get a job through the show, called in to say his dream job was to work with "the backstage staff" at an arena or an amphitheatre to supply musical guests with whatever they wanted in their dressing rooms, but Howard informed him that no such job openings existed.

Howard then mentioned he'd received an e-mail from a man who offered Eric a job selling printer toner over the phone, and he replied he'd "probably have interest" in that job.

Upon hearing that, both Howard and Fred did impressions of Eric, who demanded they stop because he didn't think they sounded like him. This led Artie to point out that all the Wack Packers had to endure impersonations of themselves, adding he felt Eric was "an annoying little f' who calls in."

Howard then reported that Eric's dream girl, Kelly Clarkson, was at SIRIUS yesterday, and that Gary told him he'd found out through her manager that Kelly saw Howard, even though he hadn't noticed her.

Gary came into the studio to say Christopher, the founder of the Exotic Erotic Ball and the man who asked Eric to be a greeter at the event, was on the line to refute some of the claims Eric had made about him earlier in the week. After that, Christopher pointed out there was another ball in October where he wanted Eric to greet guests, and that the job merely involved him making a minute-long speech and then go around talking to people throughout the night. Christopher went on to note Eric could get $500 as well as thousands of dollars' worth of tickets to the event, but Eric responded, "I'll have to think about it."

Johnny Fratto called back in to say he once offered Eric a job dressing up as a bottle of his pasta sauce, but Eric acknowledged he had turned down the job because he "laughed at" the people who did such things. Christopher then assured Howard he wasn't "a coke head," and Howard advised Eric to think about the opportunity.