Haydn Porter called in to thank the show for the interest her appearance generated in January, and then asked the listeners to vote for her on Voteforhaydn.net.
Howard said her picture in Playboy was super hot but thought her vagina looked purple, like "roast beef." Haydn confessed that it might look like that because she was horny during the photo shoot. Fred said he loved it, creepily remarking that it looked like a "secret garden" or a "magenta fortune cookie." Howard said he'd probably bang her, because she "looked like a schoolgirl."
Ralph called to say that Haydn dates a guy named Skippy, who is one of the board-ops on Howard 101. Haydn replied that they met through Riley Martin, and went on "a few dates." Haydn admitted that she slept with Skippy and gave him head, but claimed she didn't do it to better her career.
Will came in with a picture of Skippy, and said that Skippy was going to introduce Haydn to his parents, but she canceled at the last moment. Artie then offered to fly Haydn in from Oklahoma today to go to the Entourage premiere with him, and told Haydn to give her number to Will.