Bijou Phillips came into the studio to promote Hostel II, and promptly asked Howard for some clips of her father, The Mamas & The Papas' John Phillips, from his past appearances on the show. Howard conceded, and said Bijou was the original Paris Hilton, to which Bijou added that Paris used to say she wanted to be just like her. Howard asked if the two ever hooked up. Bijou wouldn't comment, but refused to swear on her dad's life that they had not. When Howard noted that Paris checked into jail last night, Bijou said she almost wanted to cry.
Howard asked Bijou if Paris was boring, and Bijou defended her friend, saying that Paris has an incisive wit, especially when it comes to commenting on others. Howard said the thought of Paris Hilton licking Bijou makes him insane. Bijou claimed that she stopped going to clubs and misbehaving a couple years ago because she "got in trouble".
Howard mentioned that he couldn't believe she dated Sean Lennon. Bijou said they bonded over their famous fathers' deaths and similar lives, but broke up after a lot of mutual infidelity. Bijou noted that she lived with Sean and Yoko for a while, and she loves Yoko's new record, even singing one of Yoko's new songs.
Howard told Bijou he loved her skirt because he kept getting glimpses of her panties. Bijou said Howard could've banged her a while ago, but he blew her off. They had discussed going running together, but Howard never followed up. Howard said he'd made a mistake, adding she'd always seemed so sweet to him that he couldn't understand all the stories about her misbehaving. Bijou admitted to spitting in Michelle Rodriguez's direction at a nightclub, but denied cutting off a man's finger with a cigar-cutter.
Bijou continued, saying she almost fought with Naomi Campbell over messages Naomi had left for Sean Lennon. When Howard asked if it was true she'd beaten up a Playboy Bunny, Bijou said she thought she remembered hitting the girl. Bijou blamed the incidents on alcohol, which she now only drinks in moderation. When a caller asked if she was into anal, Bijou said no, because she was afraid of her insides falling out her ass when she's 80.
Howard played a clip of Cher's son, Elijah Blue, trashing Bijou on the show. Bijou admitted to having threesomes with him, but added that she'd supported him when Cher had cut him off. Bijou wished Elijah luck with his new sobriety and said she didn't want to counter-attack. Bijou then asked if Howard had ever had a threesome, and Howard said he had, but one of the girls had only given him oral. Bijou added that she doesn't have threesomes with Danny Masterson, her current boyfriend, because they mess up everything.
Artie offered to match the $65,000 Bijou earned for her role in Hostel II if she'd sleep with him, but Bijou turned him down. She did take $50 to say, "C'mere, Artie, and show me your belly", in the voice she uses to talk to dogs. Artie promptly asked Scott for a CD of the clip.