Kathy Griffin came in to promote the third season of her show, "My Life On the D-List", and said she didn't think Dr. Roni looked very professional.
Artie said Robin's shoving food up her ass and he's leaving on a sabbatical. Howard said Kathy has been mentioned as Rosie O'Donnell's replacement on "The View." Kathy acknowledged that she's co-hosting the show today for the third time in the last two weeks, and reported that she recently had dinner with Rosie and Cyndi Lauper.
Artie interjected that he always felt bad for Kathy's ex-husband, because he seemed like a nice guy. Kathy said she felt awful when she learned he was stealing money from her, so she doesn't think she'd married ever again. Kathy added that he ended up stealing $72,000 from her, and was shocked when Larry King once told her he didn't think that was much money.
Kathy said she went to Rosie's house last week, and they went out to dinner. Kathy reported that Rosie's partner Kelli is much more sexual than Rosie, and that Rosie has an "interesting" lesbian au pair. Howard said he once had dinner with Barbara Walters, Sarah Ferguson and Charlie Rose, and added that Barbara seemed like she would've slept with him. She seemed to want it really badly. Kathy asked how Howard would give it to Barbara, and Howard replied, doggy-style...in the dark.
Howard asked Kathy what happened when she went to a party at Drew Barrymore's house. Kathy said she thought the invitation was a Punk'd set-up, but Drew "has a gay" who loves Kathy so it made sense. Kathy was irritated that it was a costume party, so she wore a toga over her clothes.
Afraid that she'd be confronted by a celebrity she'd insulted in her act, Kathy brought Lance Bass as her date. Lance wore "a handkerchief and a string". Lindsay Lohan deejayed the party from a laptop, and looked like she was trying to scratch, but the turntable didn't seem to be hooked into the sound system.