Howard reported that Gary had already polished off one cupcake and four mini black-and-white cookies this morning and asked why he didn't eat fruit instead.
Gary responded that he often gets dizzy on Wednesdays because he eats so many black-and-white cookies before he has anything else. Artie said the cupcakes and cookies that Crumbs delivers every Wednesday are the best in the world.
Howard announced that next week's round of Anal Ring Toss will feature a team of Chubby Checker and Artie playing against the team of the Iron Sheik and Bubba the Love Sponge.
Howard then played a clip of Will pitching the game to the Iron Sheik, who seemed fine with it until Will mentioned Brian Blair, which caused the Iron Sheik to begin ranting.
Robin said it was funny to hear teetotalers like Muslims go crazy, as they probably needed a relaxing drink more than anyone else.
Lisa G came in to report that Jeff the Drunk had some "scalp cysts" removed during his recent skin graft surgery. Jeff then called up to report that they took skin grafts from his leg and sutured them to his ass. Howard asked why they didn't take the skin from his dead arm, and Jeff said he didn't know. Jeff claimed he would still drink when he was done healing, despite the fact that his brother and his brother's kids had moved into his trailer.