When the Fat Man Weeps

Artie started off the show saying he sometimes finds himself "weeping" when he's alone in his bedroom. Artie explained that he'll sit down on the edge of his bed and cry - especially if he's packing for a trip and on his way to the airport. Howard told Artie he needed to play chess or get laid to improve his mood, but Artie laughed off the suggestions, saying the sight of a beautiful woman just makes him angry because he's not banging her.