Howard started off announcing that Artie had called in sick yet again, but claimed he would be in after a 6:30 am doctor's appointment. Howard then played a recording of Artie calling in and telling Jason that's he's got to have his stomach looked at. Robin agreed that Artie sounded sick, but added: "Anybody who needs to see a doctor at 6:30 in the morning needs to go to the hospital...again, I'm telling you, Artie is either hiding a horrible terminal illness..." Howard cut her off, knowing where she was headed.
Later, Artie called in to explain he was vomiting blood and had to see someone as soon as possible: I'm not sick in the sense that I've got like the flu or something. I got nauseous and threw up and there was blood in it." Artie laughed that he was able to get a 6:30 am doctor's appointment through his bookie and promised to be at his book-signing appearance this evening: "I don't know what's going on, dude. I'd like to say everything is fine, but I haven't led a healthy life."