Artie’s Pillow, ‘Lauren’ Meet Eric’s Kendra

February 5, 2008
Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Eric the Midget called in to promote his Internet “Idol” show, but Artie quickly cut him off, shouting “BO-ring!” Howard asked Eric what he was doing for Valentine’s Day, so Eric confessed that he and Kendra were “working something out.” JD came in to say Eric was supposed to do a “relationship advice” show last night, but it didn’t air, so Eric explained that the show had just been “pushed back.” Artie then told the crew about his mattress-humping attempt, noting that he kissed the pillow and called it “Lauren” while he thrusted. Howard asked Artie if he finished on the sheets, and Artie admitted that he had; “It was a hotel anyway. I don’t care.” Howard thought this was mean, and Eric agreed, saying he finishes his mattress-humping sessions in his underwear. Howard then asked Eric who has to do his laundry, and Eric admitted that his roommate performed the dirty task.