Howard started off the show talking about the pictures of Eliot Spitzer's "Kristen" in today's papers and asked Artie if the prostitutes he's seen recently were as hot as "Kristen," but Artie said no; "I've been with a girl in that league, but the [prostitutes] you're talking about? No."
Artie added that not even "Kristen" would be exempt from the vicious cycle; years from now, her husband will be cheating on her with a 22-year-old.
Howard replied that Artie will now have to spend $1,000 an hour (instead of the usual $500) next time in hopes of getting "Kristen"-class girls. Gary came in laughing at the papers for confusing "Kristen"'s lawyer with Howard's agent, Don Buchwald, simply because they share a name.
Howard said "Kristen" was "such a hooker," she had several names, and then played, "What We Want," a dance track the young whore had recorded. Howard then told the crew about the different mixtapes he kept while he was single; one he used if he brought a girl in her 20s home, and another for girls in their 30s.