Adam Carolla called in to discuss his lackluster performance on "Dancing with the Stars," explaining that his appearance on the show was a ploy to plug his new movie, "The Hammer"; "I've got a movie to promote. You get interviews for being on the show, and then you work in the movie." Adam went to complain that Mario, one of his fellow contestants, was a professional dancer and - as he doesn't have a radio show – able practices six hours a day.
Howard confessed that he thought Penn Gillette out-danced Adam, but Adam claimed the opposite; "Put it all in perspective." Howard asked about Adam's dance partner, so Adam said he'd love to bang her but she's too much like a kid sister; "I told her I was the Vince Lombardi of something the other day, and she had no idea what I was talking about." Adam then described the reasons why he thought she was a virgin; she's Mormon, 19-years-old, and feels (via Adam's thigh) "like a saddle down there."
Howard told Adam he seemed "creepy" when performed the sexy dances since he's really "not a sexual guy." Adam agreed, adding that he was going to "bang [Howard] the next time I see you just for saying that." Howard asked if Adam had masturbated to the thought of his dance partner yet, but Adam said he had not, but "It's on my to do list." Adam added that he's got a lot of material to work with when he finally does get around to it, describing how he gets to feel her up all over while they practice their moves.