Eric the Midget Wants a Stripper Captive

March 19, 2008
Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Eric the Midget called in and immediately complained about being left on hold for so long, so Howard informed him – for the millionth time – that he didn’t plan his show around Eric’s calls. Eric asked if Howard had seen the photos of his birthday party at a strip club, and Howard said he had; “They were alright.” Eric then announced his mission to find “The World’s Hottest Stripper,” saying the winner gets (or, really, has to accept) the following “perks”; Eric as her personal manager, a 7-year contract with Eric’s modeling agency, and a room in Eric’s house. Ralph called in to ask why Eric was on the phone if he was done with the show, so Eric said his “fans” have been begging him to call in. Eric then plugged his strip club sponsor, betraying his real motivation. Howard asked Eric why the winner of “The World’s Hottest Stripper” would have to live with him, so Eric explained that he planned on monitoring the winner so she wouldn’t “go out and get herself knocked up.”