Gary brought in the latest essay applications for a Stern-Ostrosky wedding invite, and Howard went to Jerry O'Connell's first. Jerry's essay was actually a list of 17 reasons why he and his wife (Rebecca Romijn) should be invited, like how his incredible hand-eye coordination could help stop any Artie-tossed soda cans from hitting their intended targets. A caller wondered if John "sure-to-be-invited" Stamos would be upset by Jerry and Rebecca's presence, but Howard didn't think so: "John bangs so many chicks, I can't see him caring much...I'll ask him."
Howard then read a sincere and heartfelt essay from Kevin Kraft, but it failed to win Howard over: "That's not gonna do it." Inspired by Kevin's quick transition from completely unknown to well-known staff member, Gary speculated that the in-studio crew couldn't name most of the staff. Howard and Robin disputed the claim, so Gary brought in two random staffers. True to form, Howard and Robin couldn't name the poor guys – each of whom were 3-year employees at HowardTV.