A COUPLE’S LIFE IN PORN

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Howard got husband-and-wife porn duo ‘Shawn’ and ‘Kelly’ on the line to see if he could get them to have sex while they were on the phone. Kelly claimed they’d already started: “He’s actually giving me oral right now as I’m talking to you.”

After saying they frequently had threesomes (“It’s not that hard. We go to strip clubs a lot.”), Kelly held the receiver to her vagina as Shawn worked on her. Howard was grossed out: “Sounds like he’s brushing his teeth.”

The pair then had sex for a couple minutes–and finished up with alarming speed. Howard was unimpressed: “Lucky guy. [But] what does it do me?” A caller named Adam wanted to have phone sex with Kelly: “Actually I have one hand on the wheel and one hand on the phone but I can work some magic with the elbow.” Kelly obliged: “How would you like to stick your cock in me and f’ me, Adam?” Adam replied: “Actually I’d like to stick it in your mouth.” Kelly was game: “Just don’t get it in my eye.”