Lisa G said she'd spoken with two Nobu diners who had observed JD's $5,000 dream date with Ashley Dupre, so JD came in to give a first-hand report: "Um, yeah, I mean, you know. It was--it was ni--a good time."
Howard was disappointed to learn that JD had flown coach and stayed in a standard hotel room--instead of a suite--so JD explained: "I didn't work out the technicalities of it."
JD said he and Ashley had done more than just have dinner: "We actually hung out earlier in the day...when she opened the door, I was like, 'Holy f'. How am I supposed to be friends with this--'just friends' with this?"
Howard asked if Ashley had at least given JD some 'mercy' action, but JD claimed he would've turned that down: "I don't want a mercy-f'."
Nerd Missionary Uses Kiddie Chopsticks
After seeing TMZ footage of JD and Ashley on their way to dinner, Fred laughed that JD's shirt-and-khakis outfit made him look like a "nerd missionary."
JD confessed he had to use what Howard called 'retard chopsticks' to eat: "I was spending the whole night trying to use them...and then we finally got the kid chopsticks."
Howard thought JD he should've ordered more than 2 bottles of sake: "Dude, you're a 5-carafer. Girls need 5 carafes to look at you."
JD Is an Honorable Dude
JD said they headed over to Ryan Phillippe's house after dinner, where they just talked.
Howard laughed that JD should only take girls to loud nightclubs or places where they can't hear him talk: "When you start talking, they leave."
JD thought he had a one clear chance: "She was possibly vulnerable or whatever...I said, 'You're lucky I'm trying not to f' you.'"
Robin laughed: "An obvious lie!"
JD shrugged that he dropped her off at home instead: "She kissed me on the cheek and uh...and she shut the door."
The next morning, Ashley contacted JD via text message and asked if he wanted to have breakfast--in his room. JD texted back when he woke up, but didn't get a response until hours later, as she'd fallen asleep.
Emboldened, JD continued to text her: "I said, 'I wanted to kiss you last night' or something like that, and uh, and she goes, you know, she brought out the 'friend' word. Again."
JD said he ate breakfast alone instead and headed to airport early to wait for his flight: "She said I could come over and hang out just as long as I didn't, you know, hit on her and stuff...I just stayed at the airport. I didn't need the aggravation."
Howard agreed: "You know what? Don't text her anymore...she's never gotten more attention in her life and more excitement in her life than you."