She Can't Win
Sarah Silverman stopped by to promote her new book, 'The Bedwetter,' but first had to answer Howard's questions about her weight loss: "I'm making an effort! I have a calorie counter."
Howard read a few excerpts from recent interview in which Sarah said the following: "The guy I'm dating now, who's awesome, is not my typical fare. He's really skinny."
Sarah said the innocent quote was twisted to look like a swipe at her ex, ABC late night host Jimmy Kimmel: "So then they go, 'Oh, she's calling Jimmy fat'...everything nice I say, they turned it into me slamming Jimmy, which--why would I ever do that?"
Sarah continued to complain about the media's obsession with her long-over relationship:
"I have nothing but kind feelings for Jimmy...no matter how safe I play it when I answer questions, it gets twisted into something that is a story for the writer. And then--but so the only thing I can do is go like, 'I'm not going to talk about that.' And then I'm like, that's so lame…I'm a f'ing comedian…to say I'm not going to talk about that? It's dumb."
In the Bedroom and at the Bank
Howard tried to investigate the sex Sarah enjoyed with her new man, but Sarah only offered a glimpse: "Everyone likes a little--a little smack on the tush."
Sarah also joked that they were into racially-motivated roleplay: "We, like, say the N-word a whole bunch."
Howard noted that Sarah had sold her new book for $2.5 million, but Sarah claimed she still hadn't cashed in: "I am the poorest--in the ratio of non-scandal celebrity, I have the least amount of money to the most amount of fame...I'm a quality of life person. I like to do the stuff I like to do. I'd rather make an Internet video on my couch for free than be Jennifer Lopez's friend in a movie."
On Her Biggest Failures
Sarah told the crew she recently came across her old "SNL" sketch proposals and reconciled with the cast members who had marginalized her efforts: "I realized why. Cause I saved them all these years. They were terrible...maybe I wasn't cynical enough at that point. I wrote real earnest stuff."
Sarah also claimed she didn't 'bomb' at the TED Talks conference, challenging the event's curator, Chris Anderson, to share her speech online: "The guy won't post it. He posted all of the [other] talks but he won't post mine."
Sarah said she'd admit if she bombed--but she killed: "I always say when I bomb. I still bomb all the time."