'American Idol' Finale Was Heavy

Howard noted that he watched the 'American Idol' finale last night and was surprised by how large Kelly Clarkson had gotten: "She's the size of a whale. I don't know what she's eating...Ruben Studdard lost probably like a 150 pounds. He looks good. And Kelly Clarkson gained every one of those pounds."

Howard also marveled at Janet Jackson's backside: "She's got some tuchas...it literally has a life of it's own, that ass."

Howard said he didn't care for this season's winner ("The kid who won is so uncharismatic and will never have a hit.") or the runner-up: "The two of them are horrible."

Ellen's new record label also took a hit: "It's a vanity thing...She ain't putting up her own dough." Howard laughed that he could start a record label anytime he wanted--any label would fall over themselves to release his vanity imprint--and enlisted Robin's help in a new company: Ho-bin Records.