Pittsburgh Pete's Soulmate Is Taken

Pittsburgh Pete called in to voice concern about Rachel Fine's relationship with Richie Wilson from HowardTV, so Richie called in to voice a concern of his own: "Why are you thinking about me at 6:50 in the morning?"

Asked if he'd like to take Richie's place, Pete conceded: "I think any man would love the opportunity...I think I would care about her personality more than he does. I would consider her to be my soulmate for the rest of my life."

Richie handed the phone to Rachel so she could personally rebuff Pete's overture: "I have a naked Rachel Fine right next to me. And my left hand will be on her boob."

Pete pleaded with her: "You're going to waste the best years of your life with this little midget."

Ronnie the Limo Driver told Rachel not to listen, wondering aloud how an unemployed Pete planned to support his dreamgirl: "I'm paying for you to be on this telephone right now, you idiot."

Before he hung up, Pete said he'd see Ronnie in hell.