Beet's friend Dominic the Dwarf came in with a gift: "I bust [your] balls about shitting [your pants] and whatnot and I want to make it up to you."
Beet opened the gift--a package of diapers--and angrily tossed them back at him. Howard defended Beet, saying he'd had Beet on the show for years and had yet to mop up afterward: "He never once shit in the studio. Never once."
Beet thanked him: "I'm a grown man. What do I need diapers for? It's a horrible gift."
Howard agreed: "It is a horrible gift. But maybe not a bad idea."
Sal then came in dressed as Santa--insisting he was the "real Santa"--but Beet knew better: "Hey 'real Santa', what--you think I'm a real dummy?" Beet also knew he deserved better: "I been a good boy every two years."
Undaunted "Santa" picked Beet up and asked him what he wanted for Christmas and Beet shot back: "To get off your lap."