A Sack-Slicing Miracle

Photo: Andrew Evans / PR Photos

Tom said he quit Diet Coke and drank, at Ashley's request, a really funky fertility tea for over a year: "I said, 'I'm going to do this for her.' And I got acupuncture. And then a miracle happened." Doctors approached Tom with a new procedure, the miracle solution to their problem.

But the miracle was sobering: a surgeon would cut a hole in Tom's scrotum, pull the testicle out through the hole, and stick a needle in the testicle--so the sperm wouldn't have to go through Tom's (likely faulty) plumbing. Tom's hand was forced: "My f***ing wife is sitting right there. So now I have to do this." Luckily, it worked: "The nice thing is it's a surgery. As a drug addict, it's kind of a snow day.