Though he's no bigger than an action figure of a wrestler, Eric the Actor has dreams beyond thespianism - he wants to buy the TNA Wrestling franchise.
Actually, since he only has six dollars, he wants you to buy the TNA Wrestling franchise and let him run it.
So if you have millions and millions of dollars and you can't decide what to do with it, Eric has a deal for you: purchase the 70% of TNA wrestling that's up for sale, give it to Eric, and in return, he'll give you a 20% discount on beverages and food at TNA events.
That's not a joke.
When questioned about his ability to run a large company, Eric immediately pushed back, revealing that he was actually some sort of sales rep for a travel agency for a year, arranging as many as three full vacations for members of his own family and a teacher.
Take that, Warren Buffett.
And if that weren't enough to convince you to purchase stock in TNA immediately, Eric was also on the staff of his high school yearbook.
In other mogul news, Eric is trying to twist the arm of his agent Johnny Fratto to drop his newest client Jeff the Drunk. Why? So Johnny has more time to focus on Eric.
And Eric may have a point, as we learned that Jeff the Drunk has submitted a rider to the producers of the movie he won a small role in. Here's what an actor of Jeff's caliber feels they can demand:
1) Two cases of long neck beers a day
2) Four cartons of cigarettes
3) Six ounces of California Kush (that's weed kids)
4) Seven packs of rolling paper, extra wide (for said weed)
5) Enough 'Coke" to carry him through the entire time. John Strauss, who cast Jeff in the movie, hopes Jeff means Coca Cola and not the drug.
Come to think of it, that list looks like a pretty good weekend!