This morning, plastic surgeon Dr. Adam Scheiner called on to critique the faces of our radio staff, and point out what he would do to improve our mugs.
First up, naturally, was Executive Producer Gary Dell'Abate. Dr. Scheiner pointed out his gummy smile, the discoloration around his face and the fact that his eyebrows were descending with age.
Gary admitted that there are many physical traits that he feels bad about but until this morning, his eyebrows weren't one of them. He did notice that one of his eyes ends up closed in photos.
Howard looked at the brows – and Gary said he'd consider Botox to raise them – but Howard got real and said "it's from his nose down that's a disaster area."
To fix the smile, Gary would have to have bone removed. It would cost a boatload and affect his life for six months.
Of course, Gary is always thinking about entertainment and losing his enormous teeth would also be detrimental to the comedy of the show.
Benjy could use some hair restoration and needs to have his pink blotchy skin smoothed out.
Fred Norris, our resident silver fox, can use some Botox. Fred looks good but "things happen to people when they age."
Robin Quivers is a knockout and a solid ten, but Dr. Scheiner feels that some filler around her mouth could make her a twelve.
Howard's eyelids could use some work and he could also benefit from some filler in his cheeks.
The only person who actually looked better in their "before" shot was rich nerd Jon Hein, who should probably stay away from the knife.