JUDGE JD: THE GREAT DECIDER
While he is certainly not great at expressing himself verbally, media producer JD Harmeyer is incredibly decisive. He will make a decision and what's done is done.
With that in mind, Howard had four Wack Packers – Fred the Elephant Boy, Bobo, Ham Hands Bill and Pittsburgh Pete – come in to plead their case in front of Judge JD.
The prize they were fighting for: Two coveted tickets to the Howard Stern Birthday Bash.
Fred has been a Wack Packer since 1988. His distinctive voice and appearance have been a big presence on the show – appearances, phony phone calls, taped bits. He's sweet-natured and tried to convince JD that they were very much alike.
Ham Hands Bill won the Robin Song Parody Contest with his legendary "Robin's Dad" song back in 1996. Wheelchair-bound, and obsessed with sex and the female ass, Ham Hands will always have a spot in Stern Show history for creating the first famous Robin Quivers song parody.
Bobo has been a regular caller for years. Nearly every morning, he drives down to the dock and listens to the show while he sits there on hold. Known for his horrible toupee, his inane questions, and his "Hey, Howya doin' there Howard?" opening, he has been a major Howard Stern supporter. He even has a shrine built in his home and his obsession with the show has affected his marriage.
Finally, Pittsburgh Pete. You may know Pete as a weed-enthusiast who calls up and picks fights with staffers and other fans. He famously feuded with Artie Lange a few years back, and even got into it with Howard 100 News reporter Shuli Egar just this morning. Shuli claimed Pete was disparaging his wife on Facebook and the two threw insults back and forth at each other. Shuli begged Pete to show up outside the SiriusXM building after he got off work, but Howard advised against it.
Pete could tell his pitch to JD wasn't going well, so, in an inspired move, he yelled out "Release the Whore!" and this beautiful stripper appeared and got naked. Shockingly, this did not sway JD.
Gia the Stripper
JD must be made of stone to be swayed by Gia
So, who would it be? JD heard everyone out. Then he gave them all the chance for a rebuttal.
Finally, he officially pounded his gavel for the legendary Fred the Elephant Boy.
Bobo was anxious and breathing heavily. Pete was pissed. Ham Hands Bill broke down in tears in our hallway. But JD decision was binding and Fred will be at the show.