Meet Imran Kahn, aka Hanzi

Meet Imran Kahn, aka Hanzi

Hanzi, that wacky regular caller, phoned in this morning to accuse Howard and Beth of swinging with the other famous couples while they were on vacation in Mexico. Howard played along and Hanzi announced his belief that "everyone swaps wives."

Then Hanzi got to the real point of his call" to demand, once again, that he be flown in and put up for Howard's Birthday Bash. Howard calmly reminded Hanzi that he already offered him a ticket, provided he get written, notarized permission from his parents.

This set Hanzi off (as most things do) and he started rambling and rambling about how Howard has people watching him all the time. Howard tried to assure Hanzi that this wasn't true – he doesn't even know Hanzi's last name. Hanzi laughed at the ridiculous notion that Howard didn't know every detail of his life.

Howard had Robin offer him $1 million if he could come up with the weirdo's surname and he still couldn't do it. Hanzi announced that Howard and everyone knew his real name was "Imran Kahn!"

At that Howard insisted on calling him "Imran" for the rest of the phone call - then "Enron," then "Xenon," then "E-Ron," then "Zyklon," then "Boron," then "Omron."

Howard insisted that Boron simply ask one of his parents to accompany him to the Birthday Show so he wouldn't have to worry about what E-Ron was up to. Xenon resisted, so we'll see what shakes out.

Finally, Howard advised "Omron" to "draw a frog on a piece of paper and mind map."