Howard Attacked By Chemicals

Howard walked into the studio this morning and was almost knocked out by the intense chemical smell that permeated the studio. It turned out that somebody decided to spray a chemical to 'loosen up' Howard's dump button. Howard hardly ever uses his dump button, but the engineers wanted to be sure that if he decided to hit it, it wouldn't stick, so they sprayed it with some kind of lubricant.

Howard had no problem with them spraying it, but he had a big problem with them spraying it right before he walked into the studio and forcing him to sit there breathing in chemicals all morning.

He was livid.

Howard's theory was that people don't work around here on Thursday or Friday, when he's not around, because they like him to be aware that they're working. Either that, or they're jealous of him that they want to mess with his respiratory system.

There are no windows in Studio 69, so he pulled his mic as far from the smelly dump button as he could and continued to broadcast. He even read the list of warnings on the side of the can - don't smoke around it, avoid prolonged or repeated breathing of vapors.

'You f*cks!' Howard yelled. 'Thanks for thinking of me!'