The Schimmels Slow Down

Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Robert Schimmel stopped by to promote his new book, “Cancer on $5 a Day,” leading Howard to speculate that Bob may have just faked cancer in order to write a book about it. Bob said his mom thought the same thing, to which Bob replied, “I got chemo for nothing.” Howard asked Bob about his marriage, so Bob confessed that things weren’t going so well after he told a story about his wife’s pottery teacher during his last appearance on the show.

Bob’s wife, Melissa, then came in, and Howard told her she looked better than ever. Howard asked Melissa about how long she’d known Bob’s daughter before she started dating Bob, and Melissa claimed it was “only a couple years.” Howard continued to probe the couple about Melissa’s pottery teacher/”emotional friend,” but Melissa didn’t want to discuss it. Bob explained that there’s a new guy now – a yoga instructor who lives across the street…which Melissa also denied was really anything. Bob reported that he checks Melissa’s phone, and his suspicions were raised after discovering that her text messages were always deleted. Howard wondered if the couple was still physically intimate, so they admitted that things have “slowed down” a little bit. Gary then came in to note the strange body language the couple was exhibiting: They’re sitting on opposite sides of the couch and leaning away from one another.