Uncle Luke Settles Down

Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Luther “Uncle Luke” Campbell stopped by to promote his new reality show, “Luke’s Parental Advisory,” and Howard asked if the reality show would’ve been better if it documented his 2 Live Crew years. Luke said his show was a little more family oriented than the videos he shot back then – plus, he now only talks with one former member of the Crew. Luke then noted that he got married last week, as he finally found a special lady: “I just wanted to be friends with [the other girls]…they all wanted to be Mrs. Luther Campbell, but they didn’t cut it.” Luke said his 14-year-old son has a 15-year-old girlfriend – who has a child of her own (by someone else): “I told him, ‘That means she was having sex at 13.’ I told him to break up with her.” Robin asked Luke how many children he had, and Luke laughed, “Four. I only claim four. Technically, five…one of them, I never knew her.” Luke explained that he was never good with women (“you know, relationships”) because he only dated gold-diggers.

With one eye on Robin, Howard asked Luke how often he washed his hair, but Luke was on Robin’s side: “About twice a week.” Luke then described the time he had sex with four women at once, noting that all four were black women: “[Asian women] just lie there in bed.” Luke also told the crew how to spot a STD-ridden ho: “If the house is dirty, the pussy’s dirty. If the car’s dirty, the pussy’s dirty…but it’s not foolproof. There was one girl from Long Island, and her buttcheeks smelled…I said, ‘Put your hand down there!’ Most girls need to taste [their own] s—t.”