Show Rundown: May 25, 2010
Howard Hits the Red Carpet
Howard’s Backed Up
Robin Plans Another Charity Dinner
Riley Martin Was Even More Waaasted
Ex-Harem Girl Jillian Lauren
Ex-Harem Girl Jillian Lauren
Jillian Lauren stopped by to promote her book, ‘Some Girls: My Life in a Harem,’ and told the crew she got started in the sex industry after dropping out of college at the age of 17: “I was stripping and doing escort work.”
Jillian said she’d been a horrible waitress and “always really wanted something extreme,” but never became a stripper until a customer confronted her, saying: “You’re a horrible waitress. Why don’t you come to the Kit-Kat Club?”
Step 1: Stripping to Prostitute
Jillian said she did some acting work when she wasn’t stripping and met “an interesting, charismatic woman” on the set of a low-budget vampire movie.
The woman invited Jillian to work with her at an escort agency: “I thought it was going to be like ‘The Mayflower Madam.’ Candace Bergen territory.”
Jillian said her first customer was easy, so she stuck with it: “He wanted to look at himself in the mirror and do rush–like amyl nitrates? Poppers? And jerk [himself] off.”
Step 2: Prostitution to Party Guest
Jillian said she enjoyed being an escort: “It felt very powerful to me…to be able to be unaffected…I didn’t feel gross. Like I said, I didn’t feel much.”
After a while, she was approached with yet another opportunity: “I was recruited. I was told–I was tipped off about this audition.”
The ‘audition’ seemed strange: “It’s really just an interview in a hotel room.”
Afterward, she was called and asked to be a ‘personal party guest’ of the Prince of Brunei.
Step 3: Party Guest to Harem Girl
Jillian said her life as the Prince of Brunei’s ‘personal party guest’ started simply enough: “I really was a guest at these parties [in Brunei]…it was weeks before the Prince took a shine to me.”
When she finally banged ‘Prince Jeffrey,’ she was actually kind of into it: “He owned a country. I was fascinated–captivated by him.”
Howard asked if Jillian enjoyed it, so she explained that he was with several women a day: “It was quick.”
Jillian said she was one of 40 or so women in Prince Jeffrey’s harem: “A lot of the women there were teenagers from Thailand.”
Jillian was the Prince’s #2 girl–his #1 was Filipino soap opera actress: “The Western girls were in a separate compound from the girls from Southeast Asia.”
Jillian said she tried to tell her dad she was working as the Prince’s personal assistant: “To which he said, ‘My ass you’re a personal assistant!'”
After a year and a half, Jillian left the harem with a wad of cash: “I had a couple hundred thousand dollars.”
Step 4: Harem Girl to Rockstar Wife
Jillian then revealed that her husband, Weezer bass player, Scott Shriner, was in the green room: “This is the true Prince in the equation.”
Scott came in to say he knew Jillian was a handful when they met (“She looked like trouble.”) but quickly learned he’d found someone with a past that matched his own: “I’ve been going to porno theaters since I was in the 6th grade. I equated love with John Holmes.”