K.C. Armstrong called in with a bizarre bit: a review of the staff's half-naked bodies. K.C. had somehow seen a 2-year-old HowardTV special during which the staff had taken off their shirts--and now wanted to give his professional opinion, starting with Howard: "You have a good back. Your back is nice. But you have cow nipples...Sal has big nipples too."
Howard was surprised: "By the way, is K.C. gay or what?" K.C. wasn't sure: "I might be a gay. I don't know."
K.C. went on, saying Fred looked amazing: "He's got a jacked-up chest. He's got good arms."
K.C. also said Richard looked "like a lumberjack"--and Benjy? 'Cockstrong': "He looks cockstrong...but he has small nipples."
Howard couldn't help but laugh: "I'm freaked out."
K.C. admitted he was in a bad way: "I'm having a little panic attack. It's all good...I'm on Librium. It's for the DTs." Howard thought Librium wasn't what K.C. seemed to need most: "You ought to go on that drug Penis-in."