VIDEO: Jeff Ross on Being a 10-Year-Old Black Belt, Roasting Steven Seagal, and Battling Cancer
VIDEO: Jeff Ross on Being a 10-Year-Old Black Belt, Roasting Steven Seagal, and Battling Cancer
“Roastmaster General” also opens up about his start in comedy and the time he roasted prisoners right in front of their faces
Long before Jeff Ross was the “Roastmaster General,” a famous stand-up comedian, or even just Jeff Ross, he was Jeffrey Ross Lifschultz, karate champion. In his long-awaited return to the Stern Show Wednesday morning, where he spoke candidly about everything from his early days doing open mics to his upcoming Broadway show “Take a Banana for the Ride,” the beloved funnyman told Howard it was getting picked on as a six-year-old that led him to martial arts. “I was getting bullied at school and my mom dragged me to a karate school,” he recalled. “And thank God she did because that really taught me hard work, respect — most importantly it taught me that hard work pays off because at 10-and-a-half I got my black belt. I was doing tournaments, and that gave me the confidence to talk smack later on in life.”
In fact, at the time Ross was one of the youngest black belts in America — something that surely changed the trajectory of his path. “I stuck up for the kids that got picked on like I used to get picked on,” he recalled before adding, “I learned what it takes to be great at something.”
It’s fitting that the karate champion’s foray into roasting began with another martial artist: actor Steven Seagal. “He has no fucking idea who I am. He doesn’t care. I go, ‘A lot of you don’t know me but I feel uniquely qualified to be here today because I’m also a shitty actor,’” Jeff said of the untelevised event. “He’s not smiling, he’s leering at me now … but the audience is roaring.”
The roast master that day was the legendary Milton Berle. “Milton had giant hands and every time I got a laugh, from behind the podium, Howard, he would poke me in the ribs and then I would jump,” Ross remembered. “I keep going, and I’m hitting pretty consistently [and] getting good laughs, and finally he’s just interrupting me … [he] gets up and starts doing a two-man show with me.”
Thankfully, another comedy legend, Buddy Hackett, was there to intervene. “[He] just bellows, ‘Hey Milton, let the kid work. Remember when you used to?’” Jeff recalled. “The place goes wild, and I felt like I found my Yankee Stadium.”
Later over cigars, Berle offered Ross some veteran guidance. “‘They only remember the home runs,’” Jeff remembered Berte saying. “It means I had too many jokes … and even though he was trying to interrupt me … I was like, ‘That’s really good advice.’ And Milton and I did go on to become very good friends.”
Jeff’s gift for roasting has taken him everywhere from some of the biggest stages in the country to prison. In his 2015 special, “Jeff Ross Roasts Criminals: Live at Brazos County Jail,” the stand-up found himself in a potentially dangerous situation as he entertained a room of convicts. “I remember having a security meeting with the guards and I said, ‘Well, where are the most violent people going to be? In the back?’ And they go, ‘No, they’re up front where we can get to them,’” Ross explained. “So, my opening joke was, ‘Where my murderers at?’ and four guys in the second and third row lifted their hands.”
The comedian brought the same level of discipline to that gig as he would to Carnegie Hall. “I went in five days early and had lunch, played basketball,” he noted. “I took the stigma out of it for myself, and I got to know not just the people that were incarcerated but the people in charge. I tried to make connections and ate what they ate and hung out where they hung out, so by the time I did it I was kind of roasting them almost like from the inside out, like as a friend.”
And whether he’s roasting a prisoner or Tom Brady, Ross largely takes the same approach. “For the most part, I am just in the moment listening – just listening and watching them and they’ll usually give it to me,” the comic said before noting he’ll often ask general questions to see what people in the audience are going through. “They’re already kind of needing a little boost, a little pep talk, and roasting is healing. Whether you’re in a jail or an arena or on Broadway, roasting can be very therapeutic and cathartic. So, every now and then I’ll have a couple of easy jokes in my head … but for the most part I try to stay in the moment and give them something tailor-made original for that day.”
It was shortly after “The Roast of Tom Brady” that Ross discovered he had colon cancer. It was a fight he decided not to go in alone. “I told close friends and family — I realized I needed a support system to survive,” the comedian revealed to Howard. “My friends really rose to the occasion. My family really took care of me. I come home from the hospital and John Stamos was there with his family to greet me.”
After spending much of the last year prioritizing his health, Jeff told Howard he’s back to working on his one-man Broadway show, “Take a Banana for the Ride,” which has been 30 years in the making. “I did six months of chemo. I still have a port in, and I just had a scan [and am] waiting for results, but I’m in good enough shape to have come to New York and start working again,” Ross explained, adding, “It’s a little like, ‘Alright, I think I’m going to have to go right from chemo into Broadway, and this is what it’s going to be,’ and I’m going to have a human experience on stage.”
While “Take a Banana for the Ride” is autobiographical, Jeff believes its themes are also universal. “The show’s not just about me, it’s about all of us. I want to inspire people to take care of themselves … and I want it to be a cathartic experience,” he told Howard before explaining how the production’s title is an homage to his grandfather, who supported him back when Jeff was a fledgling comedian performing six or seven nights a week.
“I’d take him to his doctors’ appointments all day and … he’d give me a banana and bus fare. That was like his way of saying, ‘I can’t go with you, but I’m with you in spirit,” Ross recalled with a smile. “He would say ‘Take a banana for the ride.’”
“Jeff Ross: Take a Banana for the Ride” debuts at the Nederlander Theatre in New York on Tuesday, Aug. 5.