Intellectual Omelette

May 12, 2005

The Stern Show got off to a very intellectual start when Howard talked about an article he read in the paper by Belinda Board who used UN Ambassador wannabe John Bolton as an example of how the criminal mind is similar to the mind of a successful businessman.

Belinda pointed out how a lot of Bolton’s criticism centers around how he’s perceived as a control freak and his over-aggressive style – but that’s common among successful, driven people Belinda said. It’s also similar to the minds of criminals. She said that both minds are very narcissistic and self-centered and will exploit any situation they are in. Howard started saying all of these things as if they were good and Robin pointed out that he was really talking about himself. Howard said of course he was, it’s always about him! Howard also recounted a talk he had with his daughters the other day about Africa. He mentioned that he thought Africa was a backwards country and they argued with him that it wasn’t, Africa was just different than us. Howard then started to try to make his point by brining up how they practice witchcraft over there but his kids jumped all over him, saying that witchcraft is no less silly than the religions we have here. Howard said he got frustrated and yelled that he wasn’t done making his point yet! He said his kids are starting to talk like Robin! Robin said good for them. Howard explained to them how Africa is backwards in other ways, like the story he read about a woman in Africa. Apparently, where this woman is from in Africa, the custom is after your husband dies you have to have sex with his next closet kin, even if you don’t want to. Howard also pointed out how warlords there starve their people and how AIDS is rampant. He then said that he hates to admit that his kids are so much smarter than he is and said he was embarrassed when his 12 year old asked what he got on the SAT’s. Howard said he needed to get some dumb kids.