The World is Your Toilet

Howard had trouble sleeping last night because Beth Ostrosky was out with a friend so he watched “Hit me Baby One More Time”, took an Ambien and pleasured himself before going to bed. Howard said that Sophie B. Hawkins actually looked pretty good on TV last night. Super cameraman, Brian Phelan came in to tell how he once did a video shoot with Hawkins and she pulled a really weird move. She was wearing a thin dress and the shoot was at the beach so when she got all wet Brian said you could see everything. However, the really weird move happened when they were on a break. She was running around on the beach chasing her dog and suddenly she just stopped, squatted and started peeing right in front of the entire crew. Brian said he got a good look at her from the front and he noticed she doesn’t shave down there and has a landing strip instead. Howard said he should have taken a picture of it. Howard said he was at a friend’s house on the beach once and his friend looked out the window and saw a woman making a doody right on the beach. Artie asked if the woman was homeless and Howard said no, she was just some chick on the beach. Gary came in with a story of his own. He was on a date once and the girl was complaining about how bad she had to pee. They were in a rush to get back to her place, but at some point she decided she just couldn’t hold it any longer and peed on the sidewalk right in front of a museum. Howard remembered that Brian Phelan pooped on a guy’s yard once. Brian said he was coming home late and couldn’t hold it so he just pulled over and went right on one of his neighbor’s lawns. Howard asked if he came back later with a plastic bag to clean it up and Brian said no because it was so messy and disgusting. Robin said this entire conversation just proves how we’re all animals.