Eric the Midget Is ‘Beg … ging for Atten. … tion’

February 1, 2007

Eric the Midget called in to say he was “dying” to be roasted, but Howard insisted he wouldn’t let it happen because he figured Eric would either not show up or start making demands in order for it to happen. Sal then came into the studio and reported Eric got “a harassment warning” for repeatedly calling a celebrity, but Eric claimed he only called the woman just “several times.” Eric explained that the woman in question was having people follow her back to her apartment, and he received a warning because of those peoples’ actions. He also denied Gary’s report that he sent her flowers. Although Eric wouldn’t reveal the woman’s name, he mentioned a number of times that he had her number because the TV show, “‘Three Wishes,’ gave out a lot of information” about her.

Howard acknowledged he was afraid he’d end up feeling badly for Eric if he allowed him to be roasted, comparing the idea to bits he did in the past featuring a woman with no arms trying to eat and Siamese twins connected by the head singing “The Star Spangled Banner.” When Sal then admitted he’d have trouble roasting Eric given his condition, Eric responded he thought his rebuttals would trump any of the comics’ insults. Eric again claimed he wanted to be roasted, and referred to Howard as “a chicken shit” for refusing his request.

Another Attempt to Be Roasted

Eric the Midget called back in to say he was going to be persistent about being the show’s next roastee, insisting he could handle it.

However, Howard again told Eric he didn’t think the potential roast would be effective because the comedians wouldn’t want to make fun of him, and that he’d be depressed for Eric as well. Artie then asked why Eric was so interested in being roasted, to which he replied, “To prove I can take it.”

Howard then noted he’d been in the radio business for years, and assured Eric his roast wouldn’t be funny.

To please Eric, Howard went around the room to see if everyone felt the same as him, and Gary was the only one who didn’t – but only because he thought Eric was such a pest he wanted to see him get roasted. Eric then said “F’ you all” when Howard informed him he needed to abide by the show vote.