Ham Hands Bill Turns Up the Creep Factor

June 2, 2009
Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Ham Hands Bill rolled in to judge some wanna-be Playboy centerfolds and told the crew he was a worthy judge given the 100’s of megabytes of porn on his computer. His favorite films feature open-mouth bukkake: “When they [finish] inside [the girl’s mouth], it’s much better.”

Howard asked Bill if, despite being paralyzed, he still had feeling in his penis, and Bill confirmed he did – he learned the hard way, while the nurse was inserting his catheter for the first time after his accident. Bill then told the crew about dating a young girl who wanted to remain a virgin: “So she gave me her behind…she started pulling [down] her own panties after she felt my hard dick between her butt cheeks.”

Howard joked, “What happened to this girl? Did they ever find her?” and turned to fellow judge Lou Bellera, who told the crew he and his wife, Amy Fisher, weren’t planning to make another porno: “But we live in a capitalist world, and we have to pay the bills.”