Dave Attell Wants His Money Back

June 10, 2009
Photo: Santiago Interiano / PR Photos

Dave Attell stopped by to promote some upcoming shows at Caroline’s and told Howard he had a bone to pick with Sam Simon. He appeared on Sam’s new poker TV show and ended up owing him—not a charity—money.

Howard asked Sam back into the studio and told him it was weird to charge the stars he was using to launch the show: “It is a weird thing to [have them] leave owing you thousands of dollars.”

Sam replied, “Let’s assume you think it’s about charity. Wouldn’t you ask some questions like, ‘What’s the charity?'”

Dave reported he was doing something about old porn movies from the ’70s for the G4 network: “I hope it’s the new [Sam Simon’s] Poker Show.”

Dave also told Howard about his masturbation habits: “Sometimes I masturbate and smoke and that’s kinda cool. Because I feel like the prostitute.”

He also tugs it in the shower: “And that’s kinda weird because I have a shower curtain with all the presidents on it. And when the water hits it, it looks like they’re crying.”