‘Donald Sterling’ Tries to Apologize Again

June 4, 2014
Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Yes, Robin is indeed a black Woman

A man claiming to be controversial Clippers owner Donald Sterling called up early in the show this morning. He wanted to apologize once and for all for his racist remarks.

In typical Sterling fashion, it did not go well.

He began, saying ‘I’ve been educating myself on black history. I didn’t realize all the terrible things they’ve been through. I got very emotional watching a documentary called ‘Planet of the Apes’. OHHH how they struggled!’

Howard tried to get him back on the apology track, but he digressed into another tagent:

‘I wonder, why isn’t AIDS doing a better job? Can you believe how lazy AIDS is at being AIDS?! It’s the black person of diseases.’

Oy vey! Finally, he asked to speak to Robin Quivers. Maybe speaking toa black woman would get a more direct, sincere apology out of Mr. Sterling. Not so! He heard Robin’s voice and right away he knew she couldn’t be black.

‘Please don’t tease an old man,’ he said. ‘I know a black when I hear one. She sounds whiter than the sheet I wear to my horrible meetings. Robin if you’re listening, let me apologize in your language: ‘Hooga booga booga booga click, click, click.”

Man oh man, this guy is a lost cause. Anyway, hopefully Mr. Sterling will try again someday soon.