George Takei Picks His Top Celebrity Penis in Cocktober Bracket

Porn stars Austin Wolf and Johnny V offer their much-appreciated assistance

October 16, 2017
Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Cocktober thrusted forward Monday morning with George Takei live in the studio and ready to decide which celebrity had the best-looking penis out of a selection of eight famous studs who have shown off their manhood at one point or another.

Also in studio to assist George in filling out his bracket were porn stars Austin Wolf and Johnny V, who both stripped down nude to help set the mood.

Their impressive physiques only proved to distract George from the task at hand. “The pectorals are great,” he described of Austin, noting that he also has a “beautiful cock.”

Johnny, a five-year veteran of the porn industry, was no less breathtaking for George, either.

Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Moving on to the official bracket, George examined nude photos of Jason Segel, Orlando Bloom, Michael Fassbender, Robert De Niro, Daniel Craig, Justin Bieber, Eric Andre, and Shia LaBeouf.

Contemplating each matchup thoughtfully, George told Howard he needed to judge the whole package of each star. He was ultimately most impressed by finalists Daniel Craig, who struck an intriguing pose in his photo, as well as Michael Fassbender, who sported a “lean body.”

In the end it, was Fassbender who took the title of George’s favorite Hollywood penis, but he was complimentary of each celebrity’s attributes.

Check out the full bracket below and be sure to head over to if you’d like to see uncensored photos of the film phalluses.

Photo: The Howard Stern Show

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