Meet Thursday Lane, the Hard-Working Fart Porn Hopeful

“I’m jealous of your seat that you sit on every day,” YouTuber tells Howard

Photo: Youtube

Thursday Lane is trying to accomplish a decade-long dream of breaking into fart porn. The YouTuber told Howard and Robin on Tuesday's Stern Show he's willing to work long hours making these videos and listed the types of people he'd want to pass wind on him.

"White guys and butch women," Thursday told Howard. "And also I like trans guys, transsexual men, females that turn to men."

However, Thursday draws the line at having black men fart on him. He explained only farts from white men turn him on.

"People think I should worship a big black dick. I don't want that. I want to like what I like," Thursday said.

He also confessed to creating categories for men based on their hair color that describes their farts, or what he calls "cream." Thursday calls farts from blonde men "chicken cream" and farts from redheads "barbecue-buffalo cream." Darker-haired guys have "beef cream" and he refers to older gentlemen's flatulence as "silver trout cream."

Howard wondered which Hollywood celebrities Thursday would like to have fart on him and he confessed to having fart fantasies about David Schwimmer, Neil Patrick Harris (whom he called Neil Patrick Harrison), and even Howard Stern. Upon hearing his own name, Howard played tape of a fart he let out on air in 2013.

"I'm jealous of your seat that you sit on every day," Thursday told Howard after hearing the clip. "I wish I was a chair."

This month will mark Thursday's 33rd birthday and his sole wish is to finally get a gig in fart porn. Howard doesn't have anything to do with that industry (and wasn't even sure it existed) but encouraged Thursday to follow his dreams. He had a similar dream about becoming a broadcaster when he was younger and recalled his mother once telling him, "someone's got to be on the radio, why not you?"

"And I say this to Thursday Lane: someone's got to be farted on, why not you?" Howard said with a laugh.

"I hope people reach out to him," Robin added.

To check out Thursday Lane on his YouTube channel, click here.