Richard Christy’s Hat No Longer a Target After Benjy Bronk Involvement

It’s over.

After losing a bet to JD Harmeyer that was supposed to lead to several Stern Show staffers ejaculating on his beloved Kansas City Chiefs hat, Richard Christy appears to be off the hook. As was feared, things appeared to go south once Benjy Bronk took possession of it.

“It’s just the Benjy factor,” Howard said Monday of the faltered enthusiasm among the staff for the ongoing segment. “It just kind of fell apart … I don’t even care about seeing the hat on Richard’s head now.”

“It was so fun to follow Sal, and once it got to Benjy the conversation was like, ‘Are we really doing this? Do we even know if we can get the hat from Benjy?’,” Jason Kaplan said in agreement. “I don’t know, all the laughter was gone.”

His hat already ruined thanks to Sal Governale’s contributions, Richard was still disappointed at the update. “This is sad,” he admitted before revealing co-host Robin Quiver’s initial support and enthusiasm. “She made like a special cap for me to wear under the cum hat and now it’s not going to happen.”

For his part, Sal was not surprised. “It was like the fourth down of the Super Bowl and then this kid … kicks the ball the wrong way and everybody’s just deflated,” he suggested before directly criticizing Benjy for not finishing on the hat several times despite having it. “Why wouldn’t you save your load for the hat? You’re subconsciously saying, ‘Fuck you.’”

“I’ll say it consciously—fuck you,” Benjy fired back at his colleague. “Because you’re putting down my cum.”

Despite the frustrating conclusion for the Chiefs hat—there is some hope for Richard’s University of Kansas Jayhawks hat, which he was wearing in support of them making it into the NCAA men’s basketball final. “If they lose, I’m going to take a shit in that hat,” Sal offered of the cap, which Richard claimed to own since the 1990s.

“Benjy probably has some big turds,” Howard jokingly added after suggesting his longtime staffer would be able to successfully contribute.

In related news, Richard and Sal wound up using the cum hat as inspiration for several phony phone calls—including one where they were able to get favorite target Swap Shop to put it up for sale. “Great crowning achievement,” Howard said of the stunt. Listen to the call (below).