Memet Walker Has a Major Rat Infestation Problem in His Apartment

“I feel like rats are more confident now that most people are gone, they don’t hide as much anymore,” Stern Show staffer tells Howard

April 28, 2020

When Memet Walker moved in with his girlfriend earlier this year, he didn’t know they’d be taking on several other roommates as well: a plethora of rats.

“It’s definitely gotten worse,” the Stern Show staffer told Howard Tuesday of his building’s vermin problem since the COVID-19 crisis. “I feel like rats are more confident now that most people are gone, they don’t hide as much anymore. They’re louder, they don’t run from you like they used to.”

“That’s fucking crazy, that’s in his wall,” Howard said upon hearing audio of the rats making menacing noises in Memet’s apartment.

“That would drive me nuts,” co-host Robin Quivers agreed.

Unfortunately, the staffer’s issues don’t end there. “Every evening for some mysterious reason from like 6 to 10 p.m. there’s just an overwhelming smell of shit that just fills the whole building … but then it goes away,” Memet revealed. “We call our landlord, the phone just rings. He’s turned off his voicemail.”

Clearly upset, both Howard and Robin were quick to offer advice on what Memet should do. “Stop paying your rent,” Howard insisted. “I’m serious, he’ll be in touch.”

“You should organize,” Robin suggested.

But it was Dorothy, a spirited longtime New York City resident, who called in with possibly the strongest guidance. “If you have rats and that odor, your building can do a rent strike,” Dorothy explained to Memet. “Do not pay your rent, hold it in escrow.”

When the staffer didn’t think he’d be able to get onto his roof for fresh air upon her suggestion, Dorothy doubled down. “Just go up there!” the caller said, raising her voice. “This is a pandemic. If there’s an alarm on the door just push it the fuck open and take a hammer to the alarm, that’s what I did. It’s survival of the fittest in this town right now, dear.”

During his chat with Howard, it was revealed that Memet recently attended a Zoom staff meeting pantless, albeit by accident. “It was like a new world, we were all trying to navigate and figure out how to work Zoom,” he defended. “Believe me, there’s no way in hell I wanted anyone I work with to see my penis. It’s been a nightmare.”