AUDIO: Chris Wilding Asks High Pitch Erik to Role-Play as Santa During Holiday-Themed Phone Sex

High Pitch Erik and Chris Wilding on the Stern Show couch together in November Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Santa Claus apparently isn’t the only one coming down the chimney this year.

On Wednesday, Howard played a clip of High Pitch Erik and Chris Wilding engaging in a graphic, holiday-themed phone sex session. The Wack Packer and the recently anally unchaste Stern Show staffer’s steamy interaction began when Chris surprised High Pitch with a call out of the blue to say he was all alone and looking to have some holly jolly adult fun.

“I have this fantasy where, like, it’s Christmas Eve and I’m sitting by the fireplace completely nude and I hear a big bellowing ‘ho, ho, ho’ and it’s you dressed as Santa coming down the chimney,” Chris began.

High Pitch wasted no time getting into character as Old St. Nick. “Ho, ho, ho, Chris Wilding. It’s me,” he said in an uncharacteristically deep voice.

The conversation heated up quickly but took a turn for the bizarre after Chris asked Erik to thump the phone with his manhood. “Chris, I have an erectile dysfunction … My dick is hard,” Erik told him, unaware what the term meant.

“You’re erect? That’s not a dysfunction,” Chris responded before once again asking Santa to slap his one-eyed reindeer against the phone.

The Wack Packer obliged and the phone sex continued with Erik now calling Chris his naughty “little elf.” “I’m going to squeeze you tight and never let you go and wrap you around my belly like a baby in a harness,” Erik told him.

The phone sex escalated with both men growing more excited until finally reaching completion. “Merry Christmas my little elf,” Erik said. “I love you.”

After playing the call, Howard got Erik on the phone. “That was quite a scenario you were building there,” Howard’s co-host Robin Quivers told him.

Erik once again insisted he wasn’t gay but conceded he would be insofar as Chris was involved. Erik also updated Howard on a few other aspects of his life, including his oft-discussed driving habits. As listeners learned in September, the Wack Packer had purchased police lights in the hopes of getting around the city quicker. On Wednesday, Erik admitted he bought a brand-new set of red and blue lights from Amazon.

“I can’t believe you’re using police lights again after I lectured you it’s against the law,” Howard said.

Even a caller cautioned the Wack Packer against using them, but he believed he’d never get caught. “When I see a police car I turn them off,” he told Howard.

Howard argued Erik’s behavior was especially egregious considering he, more than most people on the road, rarely has anywhere important to be. “If anybody should be rushing, it’s everyone else getting out of your way,” Robin agreed.

Erik begged to differ, however, saying he recently used the police lights when rushing to see CBS’s Lonnie Quinn, a weatherman he has a crush on. This isn’t the first time Erik had developed feelings for a local weatherman, of course. In 2017, he revealed he’d dreamt about going on a Hawaiian vacation with Fox 5 New York’s Mike Woods.

Zooming around the city without any regard for traffic laws apparently also affords High Pitch Erik even more opportunities to see Stern Show staffers in person. According to Shuli Egar, the Wack Packer recently appeared at one of his events and started selling deep-tissue massages to those in attendance. He even gave one to Shuli’s back-office colleague Sal Governale.

“Howard, it was—I’m not kidding you—the best massage I ever got. I guess because he has those big, meaty hands,” Sal said on on the air Wednesday.

While Erik insisted he wasn’t attracted to Sal, he did envision a scenario where the two of them might get intimate. “Listen, put me in the middle of Sal and Chris, and we’ll see what happens,” the Wack Packer said.